Be Not Afraid..

"For God is not a God of confusion but of peace." - 1Corinthians 14.33

There have been many times when I start off a new post that I know exactly what I am going to talk about, but with this one, it's just not coming to me. I knew that I needed to write a post though, so here are two reasons on why I should probably write one now: ONE - Because I haven't written one in awhile & TWO - There has been a lot of things laying heavily on my heart. --so I thought that was good enough for me--

As a lot of you may know I have been discerning becoming a full-time missionary for LifeTeen. What a lot of you don't know, is that I have been questioning this discernment. Whether it be family issues, cold feet, something that I'm just not suppose to do, or the Lord testing my willingness of faith, I've been having doubts. 

You may find this funny, but the first step is admitting you have a problem/doubts. A friend told me, in order to conquer our fears and doubts, we must admit/say them out loud. If not, it will slowly build up inside to where one truly does not know how to deal with such massive confusion.  With that said, I HAVE A PROBLEM!! Yes, I said it, I have a problem. And it's not my crazy dancing and wild hair either. I have a problem with doubting myself, and being afraid of what has yet to come. So many times, I find myself afraid of the 'what if's' in life instead of the enjoying the 'right nows' in life.

Which brings me to my bible verse of the post:

 "For God is not a God of confusion but of peace." - 1Corinthians 14.33

I feel as if we are constantly reminded of this, yet we don't stop to think and pray on it. I took some time over the past week to just think about this verse; when I woke up & right before I went to sleep. So many times through these past few weeks, I have just felt 'confused' always wondering WHY? Someone would ask me how I was doing, and instead of saying "I'm good." or "Everything's okay" I would just say, "I'm confused. Like really CONFUSED." Instead of praying for clarity, I struggled and forced prayers that asked God "What should I be doing with my life?".  Instead of asking for the journey, I was asking God for the destination. THAT'S NOT LIFE PEOPLE, IT'S JUST NOT. And to think, I probably could have figured this out a bit sooner..

I'm not saying that I have everything figured out just yet, believe me, I DON'T. I am still a bit confused, but I'm confused with the hope for clarity. I have found peace in the decision of waiting for the destination and enjoying the journey. You may ask me "So Erika, what is  your plan?" [First off, if anyone asks you this question, ANYONE, they need to reevaluate that question, ask themselves that same exact question, and see if they have an answer for it. BECAUSE NO ONE DOES.] Buuuuuuut, if anyone does ask me that question, I will simply tell them "I don't know" not with a confused state of mind, but yet one with a bit more clarity than before. 

Last but CERTAINLY NOT LEAST (because this may involve me coming to you one day), if you ever need to admit your doubts to anyone, just know I'm here. And if anyone has any words of wisdom or clarity on the subject matter, please let me know.
Know that God is always there to listen, but I'm always here too!!

- Erika Watson

I got married without the Wedding.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." -Philippians 4.6

NO, I did not go and get eloped at a drive through chapel in Vegas. And NO, I

do not have some boyfriend that I've been secretly dating for the past couple of years (and believe me, you would have known if I did). Instead, I committed my mind, body, & soul to the Lord. So YES, I have committed myself  to a divine being before committing myself to man of 'this world'.
It took me awhile to figure out that I needed to take this step before I continued my search in hopes to find a future husband. First of all, it wouldn't be fair to me or the man that I would marry, if I didn't find myself through the Lord's teachings first.
You may ask, "What does this involve Erika?" Well, let me tell you. It goes along with the same vows that one would take at their wedding:

I give you my hand, my heart, and my promise to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, all the days of my life. 

Now, lets be honest, some people may think I am crazy. I AM. I am CRAZY for
the Lord. With marriage bonds, one can not fully seek out the intentions of others and cheat on their other half. This will be REALLY hard for me. Each and every day, we tend to cheat on the Lord. Who is this other person you may ask. Well, the devil can be one sly being that wants to break the bonds that we have with the Lord. Therefor, I am fully committing myself to be pure for the Lord. 
Let me just first tell you, this will be the hardest thing that I will have to encounter, and I encourage others to take up the challenge. If we turn our views of our relationship with the Lord into something that each and every one of us want to pursue at some point in our life, such as marriage, then I believe that our relationships with the Lord will be stronger than ever.
There are many different relationships that one can have with Christ, it just depends on the view point we take during our time here on this earth.
So go, take up your vows with the Lord, and build a stronger relationship with him than ever. 

-Erika Watson

We are ALL called to Serve

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29.11

Okay, so I am going to start off by stating the obvious; I'm crazy for driving across the country by myself, AGAIN!! I know, it may look like I might not have a plan, but there is one. Like the verse above says, "The Lord has plans for you to prosper, not to harm you." 
Any who, to keep you updated about this 'path' God has chosen for me, I wanted to update you about the upcoming months ahead. I will be a Program Director this summer (for my 5th summer) at Camp Rim Rock in WV. I am super pumped about this new responsibility I will take on. WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW is my plan after camp. Lets be honest, I just figured this out this week. 
As some of you may know, I have been discerning the idea of  becoming a full time missionary for Life Teen Missions for the next 2 years. What that entails, is that I will give my life up for two years to help serve the youth of society by helping them have a closer relationship with The Lord. 
Well, with A LOT of prayer and advice from my family members & friends, I have decided to accept this opportunity and follow the will of God. I am super nervous and excited at the same time. Not only do I need your prayer and support as my friends and family, but I also ask that you donate to the cause. Life Teen Missionaries depend completely on God's providence and mission partners as vital instruments. If you commit to my mission and cause, I will commit to praying for you and your intentions, as well as keeping you updated on my progress on how God is working within my life as a missionary. 
By no means do you have to decide today if you would like to financially support me, but I do ask that you pray for me. 
This journey, by far, is one of the most important things that I have committed my life, time, and soul to. I hope that you can help me through this journey with your support and prayers. 
I want to share this verse with you that I came across right after I accepted this opportunity to become a missionary: "Never be lazy in your work, but serve the Lord enthusiastically. Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful." -Romans 12.11-12
If this isn't a sign from God confirming this opportunity, then I don't know what is. I just want to thank you for your support in advance. You would not be reading this if you didn't believe in me. 
If you would like to know and find out more about the mission, please email me or call me. I would love to talk to anyone and everyone who would like to support me in my journey!! 

-Erika Watson
erwatso2@gmail.com
601-490-0840

Until The Whole World Hears..

"Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity." -1Timothy 4.12

Hi guys, a lot has been going on over on this side of the country. I hope everyone is continuing to stay safe with the crazy weather going on. I can't complain, I wore shorts today - #californiaweather
Anyways, I just wanted to give you all an update on everything that has been going on. As you all know, I am still trying to figure out what God has planned for me these next couple of years, as well as most of you and my friends. BUT with lots of prayer and thought, I think I have slowly been shown the path I was meant to follow. With that said, I will let you know what has been going on.
A couple of months ago, my heart has definitely been leading me to continuing more work for Christ and his children. SIGNS, that's something that I firmly believe in, especially ones sent from up above.
The main sign I have received is one calling me to become a missionary for Catholic teens through Life Teen.

"Life Teen Missions “feeds the 5000” through local outreach, through meals-on-wheels routes, and through foreign missions to Haiti, but our focus is really to “train the twelve.” Centered on the Eucharist and Mary, rooted in prayer, community and outreach, and focused on the youth of our world, Life Teen Missions is committed to forming young adults, couples and families to become life-long missionaries who love our youth and believe in God’s transforming power through the Movement of Life Teen."

Through everything that has happened, all signs seem to leading me to this new chapter in my life.
So lets talk about the "signs" I have been receiving:

1. So you may think I'm crazy, but I took one of those BuzzFeed quizzes and it said that I should live in Georgia - aka - where the Life Teen mission is based out of.
2.  I've never felt more comfortable in a decision that I have made in the past couple of years than I have with this one. 
3. After all the many prayers and thoughts on this decision, I have never felt more at peace with something I think I should be doing, than with this.
4. The last sign was actually as mass tonight, when I heard the song "I will choose Christ" leaving church. As the closing sign, I think it was the last sign to confirm my decision in the this next step in my life. 

 I love working with teens and children, I love my Catholic faith, so why not do both and be a missionary to young adults?
With that, I just ask that you to send your love, thoughts, and prayers to this decision. I will be visiting the mission mid March to check it out in hopes that it will be a perfect match for both me and the mission. With much faith, lets hope that this will all work out! Spread the word of God, until the whole world hears..

-Erika Watson

"Let me learn from where I have been.."

"Do not follow the crowd in doing wrong. When you give testimony in a lawsuit, do not pervert justice by siding with the crowd." - Exodus 23.2

     I'm sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I am still alive. A little update about my life: I am still in California, living in Rocklin (north of Sacramento). I have been nannying for  a 12 year old girl and a 6 year old boy. They are both so precious, and if you're my snapchat friend (if you're not then add me - erwatso2) then you should know how precious the little boy is. So life is going good right now.
With the nanny gig, there has also been a lot of things going on. I've been dating - SAY WHAT!? I know what you're thinking, "How does Erika act normal on a date." I don't know. I don't know what I am doing. I'm like an infant trying to walk. Anyways, I have also agreed to go back to camp this summer. So Camp Rim Rock look out, I will be your program director during my 5th summer working for you. I also have been doing a lot of research on what I am going to do after camp; the options are either teach or nanny (possibly on the east coast - holla). So if you stay tuned later on, you may just find out what I end up doing.
     ANYWAYS (enough with the updates).. As you know, I always have the bible verses up above to go along with what I am going to talk about within my posts. The topic this time is not giving in to the crowd. With this, I mean not doing what everyone else is doing; not doing what everyone is saying is the right thing to do; and definitely not doing something that you do not agree with. The past month I have been struggling with just that. Lets just say, the devil definitely has been tugging on my heart more then I want him to. With moving and finding a new job, I have been skipping church a little more then I have wanted to. This has had me second guessing my beliefs and morals on certain things. To not get too personal, I'm just going to say this. I have recently done things that I have soon regretted after doing them. I first asked myself 'Why?. Why did I do this? Did I want to do this?'
At the time, I thought yes. I also thought, everyone else is doing it, so why not me? I pushed my morals under the mat for awhile, and I let the pressure of society's thoughts cloud my judgement.
God has placed guidelines of how a person should act while living here on this planet. We have the option to follow them or disregard them. My whole life, I have tried my hardest to live by these guidelines and I have been doing okay. Though the past couple of months, I have never felt worse. Just by not going to church, not standing up for my beliefs, and giving in to the crowd, my whole demeanor changed.
     Once I realized what I was doing wrong, I found myself slowly mending my relationship with God back together. I never want to feel that way again, and I now know that what I believe in is way more important then what others believe is right.
     Now mending my relationship with God has not been the easiest thing. God easily forgives, but I felt like I need to do more. One way was by adding one more rosary to the one I was doing. I constantly think "What more can I do right now to show thanks for the life I have been given." It's simple; instead of just smiling at the person walking by, say hello. I try to share the joy I find out of life to others who may be struggling like I was.
     You only get one life on this planet. Stand up for yourself and your beliefs, its all you have.

-Erika

Your path is the one God paves..

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." -Proverbs 3.5-6

     So as you all may know, I have taken a big step in following the path that God has paved for me; I have moved out to California. To say the least, I have not had the best of luck with things, especially finding a job. Lets start off from the beginning:
     Graduating college, I knew that I was going straight to camp to work my "last" summer (who knows if that is true) at camp. Afterwards I had this big plan, I'M TRAVELING ACROSS THE COUNTRY!! Yes, I did it, in my 2 door, lime green, VW beetle. Let's make this plan even more of a dream story and say that I am going to move out to California and pursue the American Dream --- be a nanny. Okay, Lord knows that's not "The American Dream", but it was a close enough step of me saying "I finally have a hold on my life" which is something that I strived to do ever since I started college.

That one time I traveled across the country..

  *background*   Many of you know, there has been A LOT that I have had to deal with going through college, things that I wish I could change if I had the power to. I didn't have the normal 'college life'. I went to community college, then to 4 year, spent a total of 5 years in college, lost my mom, moved out of my home we lived in for 12 years (moved around a lot), and really didn't have stability in my life.
Which takes us back to the 'hold' I was trying to have on my life. Now, raise your hand if you have a hold on your life.. anyone?.. anyone at all?.. nope.. yeah, didn't think so. So why did I think that this was going to solve anything? I have learned that the more I try to take control of my life, the more I lose control of it. I need to rely on God. I need to pray more. I need to lose some of the anxiety of living this "American Dream", and let myself live the "ERIKA DREAM." Now you may ask me, 'What's the Erika dream?' If I knew, I would tell you, but you will have to just wait and find out.
      Our paths are not determined by what we think is right and wrong. Our paths are determined by the faith that we have in God, and the decisions that we make together with Him. If it was up to me, I would travel the world not once, but twice, live in places for 3months tops, and try to see everything I possibly can. Who knows, maybe that will happen, maybe it won't. But as a wise lady told me 'Opportunity knocks lightly, so you better be listening.'

To be honest, I have no idea what my next step will be, I don't know what my next job will be, and I definitely do not know what my next adventure will be. BUT I do know one thing, I know that I will be listening to the knocks of opportunity from God, instead of waiting for the signs that may never show?


Erika Watson

All it takes is a little FAITH..

"Jesus answered, Because your faith is too small. I tell you the truth, if your faith is as a big as a mustard seed, you can say to the mountain, 'Move from here to there', and it will move. All things will be possible for you." -Matthew 17.20

Graduation day!! 

     So a lot of you may already know, but I am practically driving across the country all by myself to move to California. PLANS? Now that is something that I do not have much of. Plans change, whether you like it or not.  Like the bible verse suggests, all you need is a little faith. Faith is what I have been lacking these past couple months. I thought I had everything planned out perfectly. I had someone traveling with me, I planned the perfect route to take, and I even knew the exact dates of where I was going to be. {Now lets look back at how many times I said "I"..} A LOT. If you haven't notice (which it took me a while to) I don't get to plan my life. My life and journey is all planned according to Him.
     I look back on my "Perfect Trip", and I noticed not once did I pray about my journey. Not once did I consult my Lord, or even ask for help. That is where I went wrong. Journey's are not made with Him, but through Him.

My amazing camp friends I have
spent the last four summers with.

     I have been blessed with so many amazing journey's, that not once did I give all the praise to the Lord. To be honest, I have been pretty selfish, but the thing that has kept me going, has been my mustard seed of a faith. Through it all, because I had a little faith, the Lord has had my back. We go through everyday stressed and worried about the next steps in our journeys, that not once do we think to stop, pray, and put it all into His hands. The Lord knows our plan, we just have to have a little faith, may it be mustard seed side or the size of a mountain.
     This journey is definitely going to be hard for me. I have had to leave some amazing people that I have spent 4 wonderful years with at Ole Miss, and also some life long friends that I have spent 4 wonderful summers with at camp. Not having those constants in my life anymore is going to be hard, but I'm ready. I'm ready to take the next step into the unknown.

"My life may not be going the way I planned it, but it is going exactly the way God planned it."

-Erika Watson